The Good, the Bad & the Ugly

Vol. 11 , No. 28 , March 13, 2008
By: Jen Gubler
Editor's note: This is the second in a series of articles by staff writer Jen Gubler as she documents her experiences as a contestant in the Mrs. Utah Pageant. Watch for the next chapter in this series in the weeks to come.

I am officially a contestant in the Mrs. Utah United States pageant. Not to be confused with Mrs. Utah America, Mrs. Global Utah or Mrs. Utah International. I have paid the application fee, acquired my first sponsors and told the entire Hurricane Valley I was going to do it. This is where I consider myself past the point of no return.The GoodSo if I can't chicken out, I should really try to win. At least that is what my husband said. In the long list of things to do before the pageant in May, I put two at the very top. First, I rented “Miss Congeniality.” I thought it would be really important to watch how she tripped on her heels during the opening number so that I would have a witty comeback if I did the same thing. I'm the kind of person who thinks of a comeback two days later when no one is around to hear it. I also enjoy the part where she uses Benjamin Bratt in her talent portion of the contest. Having been a police officer in the Air Force many years ago, I still enjoy movies where women carry guns and try to run in high heels - as if that was actually possible.Second, I needed advice from previous beauty contestants, and fast. Somehow losing the extra baby weight and getting my teeth whitened didn't seem quite as important just yet. So I called on my sister-in-law Rachel. She's the one I go to when I need to talk about girl stuff. She had entered the Ms. Utah Wheelchair pageant and I was hoping she could tell me more about pageants than the directors of “Miss Congeniality” could. After all, Rachel was named Miss Congeniality.I expected to hear about how important make-up was, how to do my hair just right and what color of evening gown would most impress the judges. Okay, I'm a little naïve when it comes to things like this. I needed help and I knew it. What I didn't expect to hear was how good of friends the contestants all became and still spends time together after all these years. While it seemed the complete opposite of what you see in the movies or even on CNN, I was relieved. There weren't going to be women sabotaging each other and hiding each other's swimming suits. Though I would gladly trade mine in for a comfortable pair of jeans and flip flops.I began to see the light at the end of the tunnel. This was going to be fun. And somewhere down the road, it would be a self-esteem boost and I would look back with fond memories of my one-time pageant experience. If I was being completely honest with myself, I did want to win and I wanted to help others along the way. I immediately set to work on my platform. I really enjoy volunteer work and I wanted to pick a platform that had always been important to me and something I knew a lot about. Looking back, I thought of the domestic violence council I had been a member of. There had also been that time I worked as a youth mentor. And now, I am coaching my son's soccer team. Maybe my platform should focus on helping the youth. But thoughts of emergency preparedness kept coming into my mind also. I thought of my husband, who has been such a blessing in my life, and how I had learned the importance of putting my marriage above all else. What a difference it would make if everyone learned such an easy concept, I thought. If we had less divorces, we would have less children in limbo. Less children in limbo could lead to higher self-esteem as they became adults. A healthy family life could be helpful when a child is faced with the decision to drink and do drugs. And while it won't prevent everything, a child who feels safe going home and talking to their parents is a child who may choose not to become involved in dangerous activities. Having been divorced myself, I saw how it affected my oldest son.It was then that the clouds parted and the sun came streaming through the windows. Okay, maybe that was a little dramatic but I did get butterflies in my stomach and I knew that I had my platform. The BadMy discussion with Rachel also enlightened me to the financial stress of pageantry. I knew I had a lot of work ahead of me. More work than just picking out an evening gown. According to the Mrs. Utah United States website, I had to raise quite a bit of money; whether that be through donations, selling advertisement or coming out of my own pocket. I wasn't very thrilled about the latter as it would have meant not making my house payment.I began to tally the amount I thought I would need. There was the $950 entry fee and while they give you a lot of gifts for doing the pageant, it didn't exactly cover the financial cost of everything. Over the next three months I would have to make three separate trips to Provo so I had to add fuel and hotels to my total. There was also the black cocktail dress, evening gown, business suit, swimming suit with wrap and clear or taupe high heels. That still didn't include the optional but necessary make-up, teeth-whitening, photography, monthly gym membership or hair care. I worried that I wouldn't find a way to cover it all. I began working on sponsors and found that some people were genuinely excited. Greg Kesmetis from GR8PRICES.COM, who sales software at a great price, bought an ad before I even asked. Jed at Stout Home Furnishings bought an ad and told me how much my husband had tormented him as a child. Thankfully they quite like each other now. Wendy Smith, the new owner of Tan-Acious offered a discount on services. And Jared at Classic Sports gave a large donation with instructions to wear the Classic Sports logo on the back of my dress. I am now entering the Mrs. “Nascar” Utah United States pageant. I have found that about one in every five businesses is truly happy to help.The UglyI was very excited when the director of the pageant said we had to wear a one-piece bathing suit with a wrap. Until she said that we will be taking the wraps off in front of the judges. I was horrified. Not for myself, but for everyone who would have to watch. Maybe I needed to add stretch-mark removal to my to-do list.As always, I would like to give a big thank you to my sponsors Nissa Lamb, owner of Hot Shot Images, Tan-Acious, Stout Home Furnishings, Classic Sports, GR8PRICES.COM, the Hurricane Valley Journal, Cedar City Review and the Dixie Weekly News.Jen will be writing future articles on pageant make-up and hair tips. If you have a tip you would like her to try and write about for skin care, hair care, exercising and more, e-mail them to jen@hvjournal.com.